Advice column

Answering your pressing questions, Volume 2
Posted on 05/19/2022
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by Keely Walker

 

“I have a 50 in math and there’s 3 weeks left I’m going to have to do summer school if I fail but I don’t understand the math”

 

I see why you are feeling stressed out. I still think you should aim for a D. To accomplish this, I recommend talking to your teacher. I know, some teachers can be intimidating or even unreceptive to communication, but let’s be real, there’s nothing else to lose. Have a talk with them and just be upfront with not comprehending the material, concern for your grade, and a need for extra help. Remember, there’s no shame in asking for help. The only person that would hate on you for it is most likely yourself. Talk to your teacher (even if you do not believe it will necessarily be effective) because at least then you tried. Also, go to tutoring! If you feel like tutoring through your teacher will not work, get tutoring from NHS. You can message me personally for tutoring at [email protected], or message Mrs. Archibeque at [email protected] for more information about NHS sponsored tutoring. I believe in you, and I am sure that if you talk to your teacher and reach out for tutoring, things will work out.

 

“I need advice on how to handle coaches that do not know what they are doing”

That’s a tricky situation. Obviously, even if it is difficult, you need to respect your coach because of their position, and you only hurt yourself by damaging relationships with important people. In practices, listen to what they have to say and follow their directions, even if you feel like you know better. When it comes to the game, keep what they say in mind, but ultimately follow your gut instinct and do what you need to win. You can listen to what someone has to say without saying out loud “You’re wrong,” if you disagree, so I just recommend taking their advice during practice and taking their word as a coach, being respectful even when it’s hard, and doing what you need to win in a game. If you need advice on how to stay respectful, I would just recommend taking 10 seconds before you react to anything, closing your eyes for a couple seconds, and take a deep breath. Acting out when you are angry will not accomplish anything. Take what they say with a grain of salt, acknowledge your two different perspectives, but play to your strengths. I hope this helps!

 

“I started off (about 3-4 months) with above average grades. Next thing you know, depression hits, and now I’m failing and I don’t know what to do, and I want to be mentally prepared for sophomore year and to make my family proud. I don’t know what to do.”

I would recommend talking to your teachers about your grades. I am sure they will be at least somewhat receptive, and it is a bit too late to pull a 180 on your grades. That being said, since you say you’re struggling, talk to your family about what is going on, same with your friends. Remember that the people in your life that love you want to help you. Overall, talk to your family, friends, and teachers so that they are aware of the situation. Not communicating will only isolate you.

 

 

“I freeze up whenever I talk to someone new. I think I come off as intimidating which is why the other person won’t start the conversation. In reality, I enjoy meeting new people. If they instigate the interaction, I get more comfortable talking to them.”

That is a tricky situation. I would recommend to not change who you are though, because then anyone who gets to know you won’t know the real you (if intimidating is your personality, don’t just change that), but also try to go up to more people. Let yourself freeze up a bit and be a little awkward, because the more you interact with others, the less severe the reaction will be over time. If you like meeting new people, take the risk and go up to them. Worst case scenario, you freeze up, but that will go away with time and it’s not even a guaranteed reaction.

 

“How do you think we could make the line go faster at lunch, before, and after school?

For lunch, I believe we need to stop all of the cutting in line to go faster. It goes so slow because so many people get in front of others and clump together. There should be some sort of supervisor making sure nobody cuts. That would help the lunch line. For before school, come earlier rather than later. As of right now with the stoplight, it operates on that alone. Come earlier if you are getting to school too late, because traffic around even 7:10 is not bad at all compared to 7:15. After school, it is important to keep the cars and lines moving. By that, I mean let cars go in front of you if they’re trying to get into that main line to get out. It’s all the aggressive “I’m not letting anyone in” that makes it go slow. Even though you might get out 15 seconds later by letting someone through, it makes everything go a lot faster if everyone practices that way.

 

“It is really hard to talk to my parents about what I want to do for college. It feels like whatever idea I bring up, they don’t agree with. I just feel like I have no support and it is also my fault. I put off college things for so long because I have just been so stressed just trying to graduate high school and focus on one thing at a time. I don’t want to go to college right away now because I have not applied to a lot of scholarships and I do not want to put myself in a terrible position. So I’ve considered a gap year. Even though I listed all the benefits from me taking a gap year, my parents disagreed and said they wanted me in college by this coming semester. I don’t feel ready for college, but I also just want them to be proud of me. I don’t know what to do”

I can see why you feel stressed out. I also understand your perspective. Moving out for college is a big deal that comes with a lot of responsibility. I will say though, a gap year is not likely to provide for more scholarships. I might recommend some sort of community college to keep you going, appease your parents, but also give yourself some space before a 4-year university. Really, you should talk to Mrs. Pond, because she will absolutely help you prepare for the future. Overall, I am not a huge expert, but I would talk to Mrs. Pond.

You won the tarot reading! Here is the response:

What I am immediately picking up on is that your family and the people around you in your community want the best for you. I would try to look at some new perspectives to completely understand the situation. So, the emperor and the magician are really here to remind you that you have the power to do whatever you want. The nine of pentacles means that your hard work and your diligence are meant to grow and to keep faith in yourself. I think that right now you might kind of be down on yourself and questioning whether or not you are capable of this or that, but remember that you know at the end of the day you control your destiny and you are your own maker and that’s really the message I want to get across here. I think that right now you’re just kind of twisting in the wind, you’re not really sure what to do, you’re just kind of standing there, but I really want you to know that with balance and understanding that you can do this and  whether or not your parents totally understand your decision, do not doubt yourself. I’m guessing this is causing quite a bit of emotional turmoil but keep in mind that you are capable of whatever you need and to know you’re able to do whatever you want to achieve.